Foreverpurple

Here’s a snippet of the whole article. All I can say is WTF???? Stealing virtual shit is just ridiculous but he seriously beat this kid to get the stuff!!! The 16 year old needs some counseling or to be in Juvie.

Edwin Feldmann, IDG News Service/Haarlem Bureau
Thursday, October 23, 2008 06:50 AM PDT


The decision came in the case of a 16-year-old boy charged with beating another teenager in the victim’s room and stealing virtual property. On Sept. 6 last year the defendant forced the 13-year-old victim to log in to RuneScape and hand over the money and virtual goods he possessed in the virtual world, according to the charges.

The victim resisted and ended up in a fight with the suspect and a friend who was also in the room. The defendant was charged with kicking the victim’s head and body and trying to strangle him. The victim claims he was threatened with a knife and said he would have been killed if he didn’t obey.

After the fight the defendant took the victim’s virtual money and goods, moved it to his account, then logged out, according to the charges. The lawsuit only dealt with the theft of the goods – a virtual amulet and a virtual mask in RuneScape – but it’s the first time a judge in the Netherlands has ruled that the theft of virtual property is illegal and should be treated like stealing real-world objects.

Regardless of what some newspapers and FM radio shows try to tell their audiences, Howard Stern’s Sirius satellite radio show is far from irrelevant. These days all it takes is an appearance or even a mention on his show to catapult you to the top of Google search ranks for the day. This has been happening so regularly that Bubba has picked up on it and started making a game out of it. First he wanted Scott Greenstein to be top of the Google search and it happened. Today he asked that listeners make Beaverhunt and Heather Wiz the top searches. So if you aren’t a listener of either show you may be confused as to why this morning the number one search was MAMBO COLOGNE (Ronnie’s favorite cologne that has been discontinued) and tonight it’s beaver hunt and Heather Wiz. Just shows that you are missing out on something big. I don’t know why I find this so amusing but I do. Being the most searched on Google is a big deal, that’s a lot of freakin’ people. So I’m off to do my part!

Heather Wiz is number 58 right now but no sign of Beaverhunt

Some twisted part of me finds these hysterical. Little bunnies and dogs that plug in to a usb port and hump your laptop. I think I must have a bunny for Xmas.

I watched the video on the dogs in action and the pixelation nearly made me piss myself. But I quickly realized the noise they make would be come tiresome fast. Apparently some clever guy hacked the humping dog to give it memory and make it only hump when it’s active. Now that’s a great hack! I guess it didn’t have memory? The humping bunnies are 1G storage drives though and have a cuteness that is hard to resist. I can’t find a demo of the bunnies to see how much noise they make though.

I found a site with all sorts of USB Toys Including different breeds of dogs and dogs doing crunches (if you find the humping offensive )The site apparently doesn’t let you purchase the items.

10. She doesn’t live across the street
9. She’s too smooth for her own good
8. She makes doing the right thing all the time look easy
7. She never stays long enough
6. She’s never petty or judgmental
5. She can make a broken foot look good
4. She is ALWAYS at rehearsal
3. She won’t show me her bewbies anymore
2. She is a crazy talented writer
1. She got 5000 hits from Stumble Upon in a matter of hours

Waaah! I have NO sympathy for her. NONE. No it’s not because I’m a hateful bitch. Okay maybe I am but that’s not the reason. Houston is one of those women who looked like a piece of leather because she spent so much time tanning. This picture is far more flattering than how she looked on past Howard Stern appearances. Now it has bit her in the ass and she is shocked. This shit really chaps my ass. She is not the only one guilty of this btw but she is the perfect example so she gets to be the focus of my rant.

We have know for at least a decade that sun exposure and tanning beds cause SKIN CANCER. This is no big secret to anyone. Plenty of people are battling skin cancer, innocent victims in many cases. People who work outside for a living. People who try to take precautions. Yet, these self involved, self important, people have no sympathy for these victims of skin cancer. They don’t believe anything bad will happen to them because they are special, they are unique and they are outside the laws of nature, medicine etc. I’m a beautiful porn star, how could I possibly ever contract something so common as skin cancer? They could care less about skin cancer, until they are the one who falls victim. Then it becomes the most important cause in their lives and they take up a crusade to save the world from the same fate they are suffering. Suddenly it deserves media attention and fund raisers. It’s really a slap in the face to people who are truly innocent victims of disease. You can insert into this rant people who smoke cigarettes and then are shocked to have lung cancer and want to sue someone over it. You aren’t special. You aren’t different or unique. You are human just like the rest of us, regardless of how well you sing, dance or suck cock.

Overheard in the cafeteria this morning a woman complaining to her friend about getting ‘bad’ haircuts. I can’t imagine how difficult it must be to get a stylist to give you a ‘good’ girl mullet.

Local Idiot To Post Comment On Internet

August 6, 2008 | Issue 44•32

HAZEL PARK, MI—In a statement made to reporters earlier this afternoon, local idiot Brandon Mylenek, 26, announced that at approximately 2:30 a.m. tonight, he plans to post an idiotic comment beneath a video on an Internet website.
Enlarge Image Local Idiot

Mylenek, a moron, prepares to publicly address the “dumbest shiz [he’s] evr seen!!!1!”

“Later this evening, I intend to watch the video in question, click the ‘reply’ link above the box reserved for user comments, and draft a response, being careful to put as little thought into it as possible, while making sure to use all capital letters and incorrect punctuation,” Mylenek said. “Although I do not yet know exactly what my comment will entail, I can say with a great degree of certainty that it will be incredibly stupid.”

Mylenek, who rarely in his life has been capable of formulating an idea or opinion worth the amount of oxygen required to express it, went on to guarantee that the text of his comment would be misspelled to the point of incomprehension, that it would defy the laws of both logic and grammar, and that it would allege that several elements of the video are homosexual in nature.

“The result will be an astonishing combination of ignorance, offensiveness, and sheer idiocy,” Mylenek said.

According to the idiot, he will become incensed at the quality and sentiment of the comments already posted below the video—which will include such replies as “not great, nice try tho,” “FIRSTIES!!!” and “wtf?? lol so random.” At this point, Mylenek said, he will feel a deep, unwavering desire to offer a dissenting opinion, which he has hinted will include the words “gay” and “reatrd” [sic].

“It is my moral obligation to alert the Internet community to the fact that this video is totally gay, and furthermore, that the individual who made it is a fag,” Mylenek said.

Pressed for further details regarding his intended post, Mylenek, who will comment under the Internet pseudonym “xblingdaddy2005x,” revealed that there is a strong possibility he will inadvertently post the comment twice.

“After clicking the ’submit’ button, I will immediately refresh the page so that I can view my own comment. I will then notice that my comment has not appeared because the server has not yet processed my request, become angry and confused, and re-post the same comment with unintentional variations on the original wording and misspellings, creating two slightly different yet equally moronic comments,” he said. “It is my hope that this will illustrate both my childlike level of impatience and my inability to replicate a simple string of letters and symbols 30 seconds after having composed it.”

Mylenek confirmed rumors that he will be momentarily sidetracked by another inane task while drafting his comment. The distraction is scheduled to come at 2:25 a.m. in the form of a “related video” link featuring a man being sodomized by a horse, which Mylenek will re-watch seven times and laugh obnoxiously at with his friend and fellow idiot, Steve Blanchette, 28.

“Once this minor diversion is complete, I will finish posting my comment, then sit there like the worthless human being I am and wait for other commenters to respond,” he added. “Because, as I mentioned before, I have nothing better to do with my life.”

Mylenek said he fully expects that his comment will spawn a series of replies from other idiots around the world, who will either agree with his stance, disagree with his stance, or call Mylenek himself a “d0uche” and post an irrelevant link to a separate video that they will claim to be “way funnier.” According to Mylenek, this is all part of the plan.

“We are blessed to be living in an age when we have a global communications network in which idiots, assholes, and total and complete wastes of fucking human life alike can come together to give instant feedback in an unfettered and unmonitored online environment,” Mylenek said. “What better way to take advantage of this incredible technology than to log onto the Internet and insult a complete stranger?”

According to media critic Judy Turner, this type of behavior is not uncommon among idiots.

“Brandon’s comments in particular contain a degree of unoriginality and stupidity that you only see in the most muttonheaded and imbecilic Internet commenters,” Turner said. “In fact, I’ve seen him use at least a dozen variations of the word ‘gay.’ Suffice it to say, Brandon Mylenek is a truly stupid, stupid idiot.”

Mylenek concluded his press conference with a solemn vow to uphold the awful, unintelligible, anger-inducing quality of his past Internet comments.

“I promise everyone that this post will be exactly what you have come to expect from an idiot like myself,” he said, “and that I will check my comment regularly so that I can call everyone who says it’s stupid a fag.”

What is the appropriate fingernail length for a man? If the nail extends past the tip of the finger is that too long? Seems odd to me when a guy lets his nails grow beyond his fingertip. Is this just my odd interpretation because I always look at hands??

How sad that your life revolves around the waitresses at Hooters, pretending because you go there once a week that they are your friends and then you call and tell other people in your life what these girls are up to as if it matters to anyone but you.

With our economy in the shitter and people losing their jobs right and left how can The Who tour bring in a projected 100 Million dollars? Seems that Americans would be cutting back some on things like this that are strictly luxuries?

Why do you have to be either a degenerate with no job or uber wealthy to get on the air on The Howard Stern Show? Sucks that it is so hard to get through that you have to be able to devote several hours to calling over and over and then sitting on hold. I’ve only tried a few times and once I got on hold but had to hang up after 45 minutes because I had arrived at work.

Jesse Ventura seems to be visiting Gary Busey Land a little too often and maybe is thinking of taking up permanent residence there. While for the most part he seems intelligent and well spoken, he’s definitely bordering on cross over to KOOKSVILLE with some of his theories.

Must suck pretty hard knowing that the man you call you soulmate doesn’t feel the same way about you.

This is a pointless story about how in less than three years we are going to run out of IP addresses and how it could cripple the internet. Oh but wait at the end they tell you that the problem has already been anticipated more than a decade ago and the solution is in place…. it’s called IPv6. So why bother to write a NON STORY?? At least write a story about IPv6 and give some info instead of some stupid Chicken Little BS about the internet coming to an end.

Get some USEFUL info at IPv6

of Matt. Yes Doni I know you have been here to look at his pic more than once. Funny that you have my site bookmarked considering it chaps your ass that I look at your MySpace to see what nutty message you’ve put up for me.

So go ahead and come by every morning and look at Matt’s picture before you start your day. Go ahead and pine away over him. Just don’t let your HUSBAND catch you looking. Of course maybe I should just CALL John and send him the IP logs from my site and you can lie to him again about how you were just ‘friends’ with Matt.