Foreverpurple

Mom and I went for a meditation check at TSMO on Saturday but we went shopping first at one of the Indian grocery stores, Ambica. We finally found the Samosas we were looking for but not the Stakelets. We also bought some delish little pastries stuffed with some sort of paste with ginger and nuts. I met an adorable little girl too who just chatted my ear off.

Anyway Sunday I realized that during all this latest mess with Matt, I have not had a single migraine. Not one. And don’t think this hasn’t been stressful for me but I’m handling it so well and am not feeling stressed or miserable. There is only one thing responsible for this and it’s transcendental meditation stress management. I’m taking no meds at all, yet I’m not feeling anxiety or depression. It’s such an amazing feeling but it’s hard for me to explain in words I guess. If you have suffered depression and migraines due to stress you can at least understand what a major change it is for me to be completely off of my migraine meds and anti depressants.

The past couple weeks I have only been meditating once a day which is a no-no . After my check I have been making time again, as it is really important to my health that I keep consistent. Last night during my meditation I kept seeing blue. A light, vibrant blue like I had seen once before. After I opened my eyes I sat on the floor watching the smoke rise from my incense stick. I bet I sat there for like 10 minutes just watching it. It was so soothing. When I finally got up I felt so happy, really just content and light. That feeling continued all through the evening and into today. It’s been awhile since I’ve had that glowing happiness post meditation but it’s so good.

Worth mentioning as well is the fact that my mom told me she had a headache all day Saturday. After we had a 10 minute meditation with Farrokh she told me her headache was GONE.

Three noteworthy things (to me at least) happened during my afternoon meditation today. Interestingly enough they were part of tonight’s discussion. I had a stream of thoughts which pushed away my mantra for maybe 2 or 3 minutes. I convinced myself I heard the dogs shredding newspapers (?? my dogs have never done this) and that I should stop meditating and go check them. I resisted the urge. I had two instances, brief ones, where there was no thought or mantra.

Now if you don’t meditate those things mean nothing to you but they are important to me and worth documenting here for my own benefit.

Last night on the drive home I had a moment when tears wanted to come but it was in happiness. Tonight it happened again but it was a feeling of sadness. I am not going to dwell on it but I did have the feeling maybe this was related to the experiences of my afternoon meditation. Based on my lesson tonight I have some hope that maybe some of the stresses from my past can be released and that I can heal and be more happy and ‘normal’. Perhaps finally let go of my self esteem issues and my fear of abandonment. High hopes I know but fuck it ;)

I am increasingly excited about the health benefits of TM and am now plotting my strategy for getting not only mom, but DAD covereyes as well to learn TM.

Farrohk invited me to house sit for them while they are away for 4 weeks starting next month. I was flattered and would love to shorten my commute but I have to be home with the kids . Otherwise I would totally do it! I don’t think I mentioned this but I find it interesting that their house exterior trim and foundation is dark purple much like my living room wall. :>> That’s a sign that I was meant to meet this couple right? I liked them both IMMEDIATELY.

Tonight while watching a video of Maharishi Mahesh Yogi I became increasingly more convinced that George Lucas must be a TMer. Yoda is obviously based on Maharishi and ‘The Force’ seems to be a translation of meditation. I became some consumed with this idea that I had to ask Farrohk about it. He was not sure but told me many celebrities meditate. When I mentioned this to John on the phone tonight he surprised me by saying he had the exact same revelation! Either we are both completely off our rockers or geniuses. :hearts:

I have some books on TM to look up so I’ll probably link to those in a later post.